Passage of time

Yesterday was January 8.  Nine months.  Only someone who has lost a close loved one will understand the marking of time by the date of that person’s birth and death.  It used to make me feel uncomfortable when other people around me pointed out their dates of significance, but I didn’t get it.  However, I didn’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable, so I said nothing.  No one knew.  I wish I didn’t mark time by the 8th of every month now.  Not because I want to forget Jedidiah… only because I want to be able to let go of more of the sadness and focus on the joy and blessings Jedidiah brought into our lives more easily.  God is good, and my heart is healing.  I just wonder when I will stop looking at each day as a day that I get further away from my time with my son.

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